Heartbreaker: A Second Chance Rockstar Romance Read online

  She spread her legs out onto the kitchen counter, using my t-shirt to hide her nether regions. I had to stop in my tracks and locked eyes with Bella for a moment of tension and desire. My mind was on breakfast, but Bella’s body was distracting me into thinking about the unity of the male and female body.

  “You might want to stop that if you want food for breakfast,” I said, brushing past her and grabbing what I needed out of the fridge.

  “Stop what?” she asked with an innocent edge to her voice that made me want to pin her down and show her exactly who she was dealing with.

  “You know what you’re doing, temptress.”

  “Do I? Maybe I need you to tell me.”

  “If you keep that up, I’m kicking you out on an empty stomach so I can eat my pancakes in peace.”

  “But you know you like it.”

  “Ah, yes, as much as you love tormenting me, I’m trying to focus on something. Now get down off the counter.” I said the last part in a commanding voice so she wouldn’t dare disobey.

  Pouting, she slid down, bare feet hitting the floor softly. I knew from experience that she must be feeling hot now, that she was probably wet from just the sound of the authority in my voice. But it wasn’t time to address it or think about it too much.

  Bella slunk around to the other side of the open bar, seating herself on one of the bar stools, a lot more demurely this time. She eagerly watched as I mixed some ingredients.

  I raised my eyebrows at her. “Are you going to help? Or are you going to sit there?”

  “I think I’d be more of a distraction than a help,” she replied.

  I laughed.

  “Ah yes, we did establish that. Do you want to maybe wash some fruit?”

  “I don’t know if I could even do that without being a distraction,” she teased. “I’m just such a distracting person.”

  “I should have known, from the moment you walked into the club in that innocent-seeming dress, that you would just end up being more of a nuisance than a help.”

  “That’s rude!” she whined.

  “Oh? Am I not correct?”

  “No! You know what, fine, I’ll help.” She slid down from the counter and sauntered past me.

  I glanced at her long legs from the corner of my eye; her thighs were pleasantly ample, which made me hard to get more. I chuckled to myself as she passed by me and headed for the fridge to select some fruit from the produce.

  “Hmm…what goes well with pancakes?” she thought out loud. “Maybe some sumptuous strawberries; what about some tart and juicy raspberries? Maybe a particularly plump orange?”

  “I didn’t ask you to make poorly veiled innuendos, Bella. I asked you to wash some fruit.”

  “Who said I was making innuendos? You just have a dirty mind, Sebastian,” she said my name with the same flair that I spoke French, rolling the syllables around on her tongue, savoring it, and it came out a dirty little prayer.

  “I think we both know your mind is just as dirty,” I said.

  “Oh, yeah?”

  “Your reactions last night certainly seemed to say so.”

  Bella pouted, leaving the fridge with a carton of fresh strawberries and another with some raspberries. I got all my fresh food from the Farmer’s Market—there were a lot of them in New York, always popping up and blocking off some little stretch of road. You could get lots of things at them—vegan pastries, edible flowers, the sweetest fruits you’ve ever tasted, exotic houseplants, bouquets of the highest quality—it was one of the reasons why I loved living in New York City. There were always artists selling their artwork, too, and I loved supporting the local vending community, especially the students attending the nearby art schools.

  The two of us worked in tandem, teasing each other as we finished making breakfast—perfectly golden crispy pancakes with slices of strawberries, raspberries, and maple syrup imported from Vermont.

  And with a pang of nostalgia, I remembered the days that Lillian and I used to make half-burnt pancakes and drench them in butter-flavored syrup—the sugary kind that did not come from trees. But then there was Bella, propped up beside me, glancing little sultry looks as she took the tiniest bites of her breakfast, making sure that I was watching her. She made sure I had full view of the fruit entering her mouth, how their juices sometimes dripped so that she would have to lick them up.

  I couldn’t be bothered to think of what had been with Lillian anymore. I had someone else in front of me, someone who was very clearly interested in me. And it was a situation I could control, one that I could manipulate to my will. I wasn’t going to let that escape my grasps.

  “You’ve got something on your chin,” I said, leaning forward to wipe a bit of strawberry juice off of Bella’s face with my thumb.

  Then I brought it back to my mouth to lick it, maintaining eye contact with her. She gave me an involuntary shudder as she watched, desire filling her eyes as she leaned forward.

  “And you’ve got something right here.” She brought her hand up to cup my cheek, before kissing me, gently, softly.

  I let her; I let her enjoy the moment and kissed her back lightly until she pulled away with a satisfied little smile.

  “Did you manage to get it?” I teased, raising my eyebrow in question.

  “Mmmmmm, I think so,” she replied. “Might have to check again.”

  “You can do as much of that as you’d like the next time we meet,” I promised, turning back to my food to finish up the last few bites.

  “And when will that be?”

  “Depends on you, darling. Do you want to meet again?”

  “You know I do; you can tell, can’t you?”

  “Yes, I most definitely can. It’s written all over your face.”

  “Unfortunately, I have plans later today, or else I would say tonight.”

  “So eager, are we?”

  “You’ve forbidden me all other means of pleasuring myself.”

  “It is you who chooses to obey; never forget that.”

  She gave a little sigh in response, and I could tell that she was contemplating her choices in life, all leading her to this moment.

  “Should we exchange phone numbers then?” she asked. “We can discuss it more that way…” she trailed off, looking at me for approval.

  She was so eager there, and knowing I already set up the precedence, I slowly nodded. “That sounds like a grand idea. Why don’t you go grab your phone?”

  She rushed to comply, still making sure that her hips were swaying in sultry lines as she made her way back to my room to grab her phone. When she came back, I had finished my meal and was waiting expectantly with a little smile.

  “Well?” I asked, and she handed me her phone, open to a new contact page.

  I punched in my phone number, pausing to consider if I should put something special in as my contact name. I could go with something a little cheeky, like Sebastian: Come when called or something along those lines, but I decided it would be better to save such things for later. And so instead, I just kept things clean, professional.

  I handed her phone back, and Bella wasted no time in sending me a text so I could get her number too. She smiled at me as she hid her phone away.

  “Something for later,” she teased before finishing the last few bites of her pancakes. “Is there any way you can bring me back to my apartment? It’s not terribly far.”

  “Of course, it’s the least I could do. And it will give me some more time to spend with you.” I grabbed her hand and kissed it gently. “Now, shall I grab your things? Would you like to wear your dress from last night or this?” I gestured to my t-shirt, which fit oversized on Bella. She giggled in kind.

  “If I came back in just a t-shirt, I think I might scandalize my neighbors.”

  “Dress it is then; go get changed.”

  She slid down from the stool with a sly glance and headed back to my room to get changed and grab her things. I sighed, smiling to myself as I gathered my things, decidi
ng that I would get myself ready for the day after dropping off this lovely little distraction. No matter how much I might hint at it, there was no way I could ignore her and complete any work while she was around.

  8. (Sebastian)

  Bella lived in a nice area, or as nice as they went without getting terribly expensive. Her apartment building was quaint, with a bakery sharing part of the first floor; there was a little sign, which read, La Chaumiere. I found myself watching her as she sauntered inside, not leaving until there was no longer any sight of her.

  Damn. I knew I was going to enjoy continuing to play with her so much.

  I considered all the options as I drove myself back to my apartment. Of course, we could just schedule a time to meet again, and then I couldn’t be spontaneous, and I wanted to take her again in a way she would never ever forget.

  I wanted to remain classy, wanted a reason to make her want to come back for more. But I knew that was a given based on my exceptional skill at pleasuring her last night. And while I had no doubt that she would keep coming back time and time again, I also knew that I wanted something more out of this than just an evening distraction.

  So, a full day it would be: something she wasn’t going to soon forget.

  A stroke of inspiration suddenly hit as I remembered that I had a high-class event to attend in a couple of days. At the moment, I had no one to go with, and it would certainly be entertaining to dress her up and make her the talk of the socialite crowd—even though I had no doubt she would stir waves even if she showed up in just a t-shirt and tennis shoes.

  But how much more fun it would be to show her my authority in the elite world? And how I could show off her power amongst the same crowd. I could elevate her and show her what it meant to stand by my side.

  With a pang, I remembered another time, when Lillian and I had schemed to rule over the world together, when we dreamed under the stars of the things we might do, just the two of us. But we were fifteen then, and so naïve. And though she had been the first one that I had ever truly loved, and maybe still the only one, maybe always the only one, it was clear she didn’t want anything to do with me any longer.

  She had been such a bright light, always optimistic, persevering in spite of everything. She made me feel like I could conquer the world, and even though she hadn’t known about the turmoil that had been happening throughout my life at that time, she was the one who kept me steady through all of it. But those were other times, another life. I pushed the thoughts from my mind.

  Even if Bella would never be Lillian, probably never rival the calm she made me feel, never tease quite so brightly and innocently, I now had someone new to distract myself with. And I was determined to make the most of it.

  9. (Ash)

  It was only the second concert of our tour, and I was already beginning to feel the stress. Having only existed as a small band for the beginning of our career, we had never traveled far from New York City, choosing instead to occasionally play small venues. Our popularity was growing rapidly, thanks to the coverage of magazines.

  Our manager insisted that it was time to expand, with a tour to neighboring states. At first, it was going to be a short tour, five to seven stops at most, but when all the tickets sold out within half an hour of them going on sale, our manager decided that the best thing to do would be to expand. So now we were stuck traveling to the other coast, playing shows in several large cities in California.

  I knew perfectly well that it meant that Lillian would have to find a way to manage during the time that I’d be away. But I assured her that I would be careful and that I wouldn’t let myself fall into bad habits again. In actuality, I was more worried about how I would be without her.

  Without even noticing it, she’d already become an integral part of my life, a stubborn, bright, adorable rock that kept me true to myself, making me want to be better. I was missing her already, her cuddles and her teasing, and the sound of her voice, even though the two of us were Facetiming regularly. It didn’t feel quite the same as having her next to me. I just wanted to hold her in my arms again. I smiled as my phone buzzed, and Lillian’s name lit up on the screen.

  Thinking of you.

  Hey, Lil’, what you been up to?

  Just wondering how your day went.

  Could’ve been better, maybe if you were here.

  She sent a couple of blushing emojis, then a picture of her cat, Coby.

  He’s been keeping me company while you’re gone.

  I hope there’s still room for me when I’m back?

  We’ll see…maybe I’ll leave you a little somethin’ when you’re back.

  I loved how she still seduced me, even after all this time.

  Oh? Well, don’t replace me with the cat.

  Jealous much?

  Only because I’d rather it be your cat. ;)

  Ash!

  Ooh, baby, I’ll miss you.

  I’ll miss you too, rock star.

  I snorted and stifled another laugh. I glanced up from my phone screen to look in the mirror, making sure my hair looked at least decent. If I were to be suddenly pulled away, then I wouldn’t be a complete mess.

  And you’ll always be my blanket gremlin~

  Who said I was ever your blanket gremlin?

  Just as I was about to answer Lillian’s teasing text, one of the stage assistants came into the dressing room. He was a boy who was a little too young for anyone’s standards.

  “Ash Bennett, you’re needed in dressing room six. The stage manager needs to discuss changes to the set with you,” he said, clearly a little nervous.

  “Sure, sure, give me a sec.”

  “You’re needed now, Ash Bennett, sir; the manager said this couldn’t wait another minute.”

  “Well, he’s a little over-dramatic,” I teased, standing up to follow the kid out of the room and to where my manager was waiting.

  Because it was such a hurry, I forgot my phone behind me. Something I realized only after being whisked away from the dressing room. As I looked back, I could see the screen lighting up.

  After that brief meeting with my bandmates and manager, I hurried my ass back to the dressing room. My bandmates trailed behind me, chatting and debating on which song they would play for the encore (which was most likely going to happen).

  I noticed that I couldn’t find my phone anywhere.

  It wasn’t on the table where I thought I had left it last, and it wasn’t on my chair or anywhere on the floor. Maybe it was in one of my other pockets, of my other outfit—though I didn’t have the slightest clue how it’d end up there—but it wasn’t, no matter how many times I checked.

  I was beginning to feel a little more worried, not quite frantic just yet, but I caught one of the passing assistants by the shoulder out in the hallway.

  “Have you seen my phone?” I asked.

  The assistant shook her head, continuing about her business in a manner that made me think of a terrified mouse. I continued asking people until our manager found me.

  “Have you seen my phone?” I asked. “I think I might have lost it.”

  “There’s no time for that now. We’ll have some people search after the show; now go, get someone to do your makeup,” he said, clearly feeling the pressure of the moment pushing me back down the hallway. “I’m sure we’ll find it later.”

  The crowd was much larger than any show I’d played for before. There was nothing that could truly express the feeling of standing in front of a sold-out venue—until you were actually standing in front of one. The lively faces of all the people, cheering and chanting. The energy of thousands of fans intertwined into one giant ball of electricity. I could feel the blood coursing through my veins, as everything that was unimportant dissipated into nothingness. This, this was my arena.

  It had been a long time since I felt even slightly nervous performing in front of a crowd. But this time, it was different—this time, I could feel it—this was my big break. The fans were cheering even lou
der, smoke filling the stage as clouded silhouettes emerged from the rising trap door.

  When the entire band was exposed to face the audience, I began my guitar solo. The spotlight focused on me as the crowd went silent so they could listen to every single delicate note that was being played. I could feel the endorphins surging through my body, knowing I had the attention of thousands of eyes. When I hit that last G chord, my bandmates chimed in with a loud cheer from the audience.

  Dreams of Compass Gods played a smashing show that night. All night long, the audience sang merrily to all of the songs, knowing every single lyric and every single note along the way. All I could feel was pure, raw adrenaline. It was exhilaration.

  And after that moment, the rest of the night blurred together for me. I was only vaguely aware of the lights, the rhythms and vibrations of the instruments behind me, the smell of smoke and drugs drifting through the air, and the faint haze that seemed to exist in these types of environments.

  And then, the faint thought that something was about to go wrong; that something was about to go terribly wrong.

  10. (Lillian)

  Hey, Ash, there’s something I actually wanted to talk about. I know now may not be the best time, especially when you’re far away and not likely to come back for a while as you finish stuff up. But I need to say this to you soon, and I want you to hear my voice when I do. Can we call?

  A few more minutes.

  Ash? Just let me know when you’re free and ready.

  I stared down at the messages on my screen, wondering if I had overdone it with the needy texts. I knew Ash was busy, but this was really important, and we’d just been texting only a minute ago. I was starting to realize things recently, and I wanted to tell them to Ash, to make sure that he seriously felt the same way.