Heartbreaker: A Second Chance Rockstar Romance Read online

  Many years of dabbling in high-end clothing brought me knowledge of women’s and men’s fashion as I liked to know what was in style. I kept most of this to myself, wanting to exude a more manly image.

  “Do you like any particular one of them?” I asked, leaning in to whisper in Bella’s ear. “I, for one, think you would look absolutely lovely in the lace dress.”

  “You’re only saying that because you want to see me in it.”

  “Is there anything wrong with that?” I asked, raising my eyebrow.

  “And we’re talking about wearing it in public, right?”

  I chuckled. “If you’d like, we could buy a dress explicitly for the purpose of wearing in private.”

  “Well, maybe we’ve come to the wrong place.”

  “How about we figure that out later?”

  “Do you find it entertaining, putting me in fancy dresses worth more than I make in a year?”

  “What good is wealth when you’re not a bit spontaneous at times.”

  “I guess.”

  She walked over to the dressing room mirror to examine the dresses more closely. I admired the young beauty of the woman standing in front of me, hypnotized by the fresh and natural glow she had. I caught remnants of her perfume as she ambled past. I also noted the way she looked over her shoulder to ensure that I was watching her. My pulse increased.

  “I think I’ll try this one on,” she said to the stylist, holding the lavender dress lightly in between her fingers.

  “Of course. Follow me,” the stylist said, gently picking up the dress and leading Bella back to one of the dressing rooms.

  I waited patiently until Bella reemerged looking absolutely resplendent. I could feel my heart beating in my chest, and hear it in my ears as I took her in. She was lovely; there was no doubt about it. As one of the other stylists pulled back her hair and demonstrated for Bella in the mirror the kinds of styles, she might wear her hair in to best compliment the dress, I had made up my mind. Not only on the dress, but on letting go of other girls who should not be in my mind at this very moment. I quivered.

  I came up behind her, admiring her image in the mirror. “I do think this is the one. What do you think?” I asked, tugging gently on a strand of Bella’s hair.

  She turned back to look at me with a sultry little smile. “If you like it, then I think it’s a yes from me.”

  “Very good, because seeing you in that dress, I can’t wait to see the look on everyone’s faces.”

  13. (Sebastian)

  After we left the boutique with our purchase, we made several more stops to pick up shoes, matching jewelry, and a few outfits for later. I especially enjoyed when I’d put Bella into a fitting room and she’d pull me into the dressing room to show off a piece of designer lingerie. We would make out like high school students, stifling our giggles while we tempted each other to have sex right then and then. But we’d stop ourselves, knowing it was inappropriate, and that was the fun of it.

  She was an enigmatic spitfire, a girl who loved to flirt and was in love with her youth, not thinking at all about any consequence. We both seemed to be on the same naughty scale, and I was really beginning to enjoy her company—together, we made a pretty good duo. I wanted to make an effort to show her that I could spoil her, that she could stop everyone in their tracks, all because of me. This was how I showed myself off as a provider; I put myself to good use.

  After finishing up in the boutique, we decided to take some time for lunch. The date had not been over, of course, until I treated Bella to get her hair and makeup done. It took a tremendous effort on my part not to take her then and there. I had to fight running my fingers through her hair, messing up all the work that the stylists did.

  I was taken by her, but mainly because her good looks. She was definitely attractive, and her personality somehow suited me. I was hoping it was more than just a strong feeling of lust, that she could finally help me forget the long-lost love I had with another person—who would not be named. After helping Bella with all her bags, the two of us headed back to my apartment so we could get ready for the event.

  It took a greater effort still to keep my hands off Bella when she emerged from one of the guest rooms, all dolled up and looking like an absolute dream. I took a moment to collect myself and to breathe before walking up to her with a smile and offering my arm.

  “Shall we be on our way?” I asked.

  She giggled as she threaded her arm through mine. “Yes, let’s. Though I have to say, I think I may be more excited to return than to arrive.”

  “Believe me; I am encountering the same issue.”

  I lowered my head, pressing a kiss on the sensitive area on Bella’s neck, and she shivered.

  “What do you say we forgo the party entirely and just stay here for the night instead?” I joked.

  I said it half-jokingly, but also with a hint of truth. Her beauty was stunning to the point of reverting back to my younger days when love was bliss and sublime.

  “Then all of this would go to waste.” Bella motioned to herself up and down.

  It would be a waste; the outfit, the hair, the makeup, it all made her look like a goddess of the skies or a nymph of the meadows.

  “Who’s to say it would? After all, I’m seeing you in it, and am very turned on right now.” I smirked.

  “But wasn’t the whole point to make everyone else jealous?”

  I took a step closer to her and set my hands against her waist, pulling her in.

  I then whispered into her neck, “Maybe I don’t want to share the sight of you with anyone. Everyone’s going to want you, seeing you in that. I know I do.”

  I nuzzled my mouth into the nape of her neck and made soft suckling motions, sending chills down her spine. She gave into me slightly, and the heat of her body began to rise out involuntarily. She threaded her fingers through my hair and turned my face to gently press a kiss to my lips.

  “Who says I want anyone else?”

  “Bella, we haven’t known each other for that long—”

  “I know.” She pressed a finger against my lips, bringing me to silence. “Let’s just pretend. It’s fine.”

  “I’m not saying we have to pretend—”

  “I know that you’re thinking of someone else, Sebastian. I’m not an idiot. But I’m enjoying this special treatment, so let’s not make it awkward.”

  For a second, the way she said that made me think it couldn’t have been her at that moment. I either gave her an unrealistic expectation of who she really was or didn’t know her that well. But then she slipped back into the familiar little sultry smile, pulling me against her again to kiss me.

  I was shocked by the truth of her words, by her confrontation, but I kissed her anyway, trying to forget it. I led a path down to her neck, nipping at her skin as she giggled. And my hand crept its way up to the zipper at the top of her dress; she pulled away with a smile, biting her lip.

  “Are we going to go to this party, or not?” she asked.

  “While I’m tempted to say no and just take you right now, let’s make a show instead.”

  14. (Lillian)

  I was beginning to think something was genuinely wrong. No matter what I did, I couldn’t get in contact with Ash. A couple of days had gone by, and I followed up with texts following my earlier messages in case he didn’t get them.

  He didn’t respond or text to check-in.

  And after becoming more worried, I tried calling him, but all my calls went to voicemail. After the third time, I couldn’t bear to leave any more messages because it made me feel clingy and desperate—two emotions I hated feeling, and I knew I was far from that.

  If anything, I was being the reasonable one right now, if he was the one ignoring me.

  As a last-ditch effort, I decided to message him through social media. His Instagram seemed to be the best option since he had been posting updates of their shows fairly regularly. We were following each other, but we never really messaged on t
he platform, since texting and calling generally worked better. I figured this was better than doing nothing, in case something had happened to his phone.

  With a deep breath reminding myself of my rationality, I pressed the send button, but not after carefully debating on what to say.

  I finally settled on, Hey, you haven’t been returning my messages or calls; is something wrong?

  I hit send while watching the green dot by his username that meant he was active. Hopefully he would message me back soon. As I watched, the marker that he had seen my message popped up underneath it, but then nothing. No message, no indication that he was typing.

  “What the hell?” I muttered to myself, closing the app and then reopening it.

  Maybe it was a managed account, I thought: used for just P.R. purposes. But then, to my surprise, when I checked again, the conversation was completely gone. I tried again and then searched for his username. Nothing came up.

  Did he just block me? Without an explanation? What the hell?

  I could feel the frustration welling up inside of me; but more than sadness, there was anger. How immature could he be? It would be one thing to break up with me while on tour, but to outright ignore me? On top of that, how childish would it have been to block me on top of that when I tried to reach out and contact him? With absolutely no explanation at all?

  Those weren’t the actions of an adult; they were the follies of a child.

  15. (Ash)

  Our manager kept pushing us to attend these publicity parties after concerts. He kept saying that we needed the exposure, that it would help our popularity. And at this point, I couldn’t be bothered to say no anymore, despite my distaste for the celebrity musings of interacting with fans.

  I was usually tired after each stage performance; on top of that, traveling took a huge toll on my body. But I knew that sulking in the back corner of a party was better than getting into an argument with my manager, whom I knew worked so hard to get the band this big.

  So, there I was, on my sixth glass of some unnamed cocktail with some unknown alcohol content, feeling light-headed and giddy in the corner of a fancy hotel. I think some rich fan rented it out to arrange for this party. I was feeling like a rock star now, knowing I would probably throw up in the morning.

  The loud music assaulted my eardrums and the world swam in strange colors around me. I could feel the alcohol hitting me harder now. There was a blur of toxicity as I scanned the room, dewy-eyed, in and out of consciousness.

  Lillian would’ve probably hated this place. But I pushed the thought her out of my mind. It was better that she wasn’t privy to what was happening at the moment, and I was thinking that maybe it was better after all that I’d lost my phone. I didn’t feel as guilty now, in this buzzed moment. I figured I could gloss over it when I came back and tell her what happened.

  At that moment, an older song came on, a song that once inspired me to start writing music when I was much younger. I peeled away from the wall and set my glass down on the tabletop. I started feeling a pulse of nostalgia as I wove my way through the crowd in a half-blur of cohesiveness. More faintly aware than anything else, I danced and sang along to the lyrics while half-heartedly mingling with the party guests, too far gone to worry if I was off-key. More people joined in, all belting out the chorus, singing those familiar words. Someone handed me another drink, and I downed it fast, barely tasting the contents.

  The world was beginning to tangle together now. Time felt bright, too fast, unreal. I didn’t feel grounded, but it was an amazing feeling all the same. I was vaguely aware of the bodies that were pressed against mine, of one in particular—someone’s fingers were in my hair, someone was grinding against my leg.

  She pulled me to the side, I think—all the while giggling, seeming to me like a mischievous minx in the moment. She certainly kissed like one too, tasting of tart berries and magical words. Her tongue was definitely in my mouth, and her leg was wrapped around my waist as I held her against me.

  Time disappeared then, became one continuous string of bodies touching, mouths capturing each other, and lips pressed against my neck. I could feel the onset of dark bruises beginning to form; my teeth created matching marks in the same fashion.

  And at that moment, I realized this was someone new shoving their tongue down my throat, biting at my ear, whispering empty promises that I couldn’t quite understand. I was under enchantment, a plaything of faeries, pulled into a dancing circle at midnight, time blurring together as the world aged around me.

  Nothing felt real.

  And yet, there was that voice, whispering at the back of my mind that I wasn’t supposed to be doing this.

  This was wrong. Wrong.

  Wrong.

  Wrong…

  Despite the state that I was in, I realized not everyone there was quite as ‘lost’ as I was. I could picture it now, this kind of drama was exactly what the public wanted to see, to know that their idols were human, to know that they succumbed to basic desires as well. Sex sold, especially when it came to those in the public eye.

  The public was obsessed, after all, and these kinds of things never stayed secret for long.

  16. (Sebastian)

  Bella giggled as she pulled me around the corner and into an empty room, shutting the door behind us. I was not surprised; she was acting nothing short of an angel the entire night, letting me introduce her to my socialite circle and the influential people of the city. She batted her eyelashes at them as they marveled over her dress. So, of course, it was expected that she would pull something sneaky before the night ended.

  “I thought I was supposed to be the one making the inappropriate moves,” I muttered.

  She had, as I expected, been the center of attention as soon as she entered the room. With her on my arm, we received our fair share of jealous looks and whispered questions. My feelings were nothing short of pride and achievement, feeling powerfully dominant as the alpha male in the room. Handsome, wealthy, socially prominent, and now, endowed with a gorgeous beauty enthralled by my lifestyle. Nobody had seen her before in their life, so they were all curious as to who she was, especially coming in with one of the most successful lawyers in the city.

  She had paid them no heed, smiling only at me, though her earlier words were playing in my head still—that she knew that I wasn’t truly interested in her. I didn’t know she had it in her to be the type to notice either. I was fairly certain I wasn’t at all obvious, so she must have been more perceptive than I had originally guessed.

  There was strawberry and chocolate on her lips as she kissed me, from the dainty little snacks we had eaten while chatting with one of my clients earlier: a local politician. I assumed it would only be a matter of time until one of us decided we were tired of waiting. Sooner or later, we would’ve snuck away for some minor indulgence, but I didn’t think it would be this soon, or this sudden.

  Not that I was complaining, though. Bella grabbed my hand, and as we were in the privacy of an empty room away from all the people, she whispered in my ear as she breathed against me.

  “I thought you said this dress was irresistible.” Bella grabbed my hands and ran them down her slim waist.

  The muted sounds of the crowd were heard through the half-closed door. And I did my best to stay under wraps, kept our engagement under just a low whisper.

  “Did I ever contradict that?” I said, sliding my hands down her hips.

  I felt her body beneath the lace, watching as skin appeared and disappeared as she shifted. I engulfed her in the warmth of my body, caressing the lower section of her back, and realizing that our heartbeats were in sync in the current moment.

  “You did when you resisted me.”

  “I think you’ll find I just have an immense amount of self-control and patience,” I said, whispering in her ear. “Especially when it comes to the subject of pleasure.”

  She shivered, then turned to kiss me, working on my neck and jaw with soft little bites that made me
think of a kitten suddenly trying to be a predator.

  “Well, that’s no fun,” she said between kisses, and I laughed.

  “Bella, you’re tickling me more than anything.”

  “Shut up,” she grumbled.

  I caught her face between my hands, making her look at me so that I could kiss her on the lips. I was aware that I was messing up her makeup, but I didn’t care about that right now. I just cared about the taste of champagne and strawberries. I cared about the faint hint of mint on her breath. I cared about the way her body felt pressed against me, and I cared about the way she made me feel, the distraction that came with it.

  Sometimes I thought that she might end up being more than a distraction, but that was my body speaking and not my mind; that was my desire to have her, to make her want me so desperately that she couldn’t bear to think of anyone else. I pushed her up against the wall, wishing that she was wearing a shorter dress so that she could wrap her legs around my waist, but making do anyways.

  “You know I’ve been wanting to do this all night, does that make you feel better?” I murmured, fingers locked in her updo, pulling gently to expose her neck so that I could scrape my teeth along it. “You’re such a naughty little girl, pulling me away from the party like this.”

  “Yes,” she gasped as I bit down, then kissed the spot gently, looking back up at her.

  “You’re a selfish little girl too, wanting my attention all to yourself, you know that?”

  I tugged a little harder when she didn’t answer immediately, to which she gasped out a “Yes,” and was silent again, her heavy breathing became an indication of her arousal.

  I thought I could almost smell it on her, beneath the expensive perfume, that tangy metallic scent that let me know that she wanted me, despite the fact that this place was far from appropriate.