Heartbreaker: A Second Chance Rockstar Romance Page 21

  “Maybe you should have come out in one of those crotchless little numbers,” I said as I pressed a kiss to the back of her thigh. “That way I could have my way with you without you even having to undress.”

  “I can still change,” she replied.

  “Only if I get to undress you.” I slid the straps down, standing as I twirled her once again, exposing her breasts so that I could kiss and nibble at them playfully before sliding the fabric over her hips and letting it pool on the floor like liquid.

  “I’ll see you in a moment,” she said with a little wave, leaving me to prance away.

  I sat back with a groan, hoping that this time she was faster because I was craving her so much now, maybe a little too much.

  When she returned, she took my breath away. She was dressed in a lacy little top and matching bottoms that were crotchless to allow for easier access. Somehow, she managed to add a semblance of innocence to the ensemble, turning me on even more, if that were even possible.

  “You’re too hot,” I growled, stalking towards her and taking her by the waist. Roughly, I pulled her against me, crushing her mouth with mine, wanting to devour her in passion. I tugged at her hair as she gasped, my other hand slid down her back to lightly fondle her butt. I ground against her, knowing she could feel the pressure of me, moaning as I discovered how wet she was.

  I walked her back over to the bed, forcing her down with a push against her shoulders, surveying her once more. She lay before me, one coy hand laid on her chest, batting her eyelashes, and the other crept towards her lower regions in suggestion.

  “I know what you want, and I’m going to give it to you.” I approached her, crawling onto the bed so that I was hovering over her.

  I supported her back with one hand, bringing her up to meet my mouth, and with the other, I began to tease at her clitoris, relishing in the moans she released. I positioned myself perfectly middle her legs, shimmying to fit my broad shoulders into the small space. I looked into her eyes with an almost evil demeanor and gave her a half-smirk showcasing how beautiful I was. I continued teasing her, kissing her inner thighs seductively—a little too slowly, keeping the anticipation, raising her temperature more and more as she almost begged me to stick my tongue inside her.

  “Please.” She squirmed.

  I flashed her a look of authority, a look that showed her that I knew exactly what I was doing. Using my thumb, I circled small ovals into the hood of her clitoris, admiring the shape of her lady parts, how smooth and clean-shaven it was. Finally, as to finally give her what she wanted, I put the surface of my tongue on her inner labia. Sucking and soothing various parts of her nether region lips. Making sure my wet tongue was getting into all of the different crevices her body had to offer.

  Bella moaned in union, her writhing body pressing against my mouth in a state of pure bliss and pleasure. I grabbed her waist and pushed her sweet entrance to meet my tongue more deeply and started thrusting her body in and out of my suckling lips. I stopped at her clitoris and started sucking on it viciously. Bella could no longer contain herself, and she let out a satisfying moan of sweet release, and her body rhythmically shuddered in appreciation.

  I could feel the pulsating of Bella’s body, tasting her sweet juices that were leaking out of her, swallowing the entirety of her cum. I didn’t stop, though. Even knowing that she had already climaxed, I wanted to keep torturing her. I increased the pace of my teasing, sliding a couple of fingers into her; I knew she was trying to keep up the pace, not complaining that she needed a moment to reset her button. I relaxed my teasing, causing the pressure to stop its build in her, making her whine in protest.

  “Soon enough, lovely,” I whispered against her, biting at her bottom lip and beginning to explore her again with my fingers.

  I positioned himself to enter her, thrusting in one smooth motion that had her throwing her head back in relief and pleasure, not having any trouble because of how well lubricated she was.

  The pressure of my huge shaft built up in between Bella’s legs, and she grabbed my neck and held my face up to hers to sloppily make out with me. The tip of my manhood hit the very back of Bella’s entrance every single time I built up momentum, thrusting strategically into the places that I knew yielded more pleasure.

  “Oh my god! Sebastian! Harder!”

  Feeling my animal instincts kick in, I began to thrust even faster, creating loud slapping noises as my thighs hit the bottom part of her legs. Bella could barely contain her cries, gasping for air as she was being pleasured so rightfully so, like a woman reaching maturity for the first time. I felt her pleasure release before my own did, holding myself out as long as possible to provide her the greatest enjoyment a man could ever give and finally releasing myself on her breasts and neckline.

  Beneath me, Bella hummed in delight. “Wow…” she said, clearly very content.

  “I told you I could satisfy, didn’t I?”

  Bella gave me a sly little smile and nodded. “I should have trusted you from the beginning.”

  “Did you not?”

  She looked away, playing at shamefulness. “Maybe just a little bit.”

  “Well then, I hope this serves as a lesson to never doubt me again, because I never fail to deliver.”

  “I look forward to seeing more of that.” She leaned up to kiss me, just one, gentle, innocent kiss, juxtaposed by everything we had just done and everything that she was suggesting.

  “Trust me; I have many more surprises in store. This is just the beginning.”

  “Oh, is that so?” she giggled, a little flustered as I began to idly tease her again.

  “I would say I could show you right now, but we might want to take a little break for your sake.”

  “Are you sending me home so soon?” she asked with a pout, and I shook my head.

  “No, just suggesting that we turn our attention to something else, even if that may be difficult.” I gave her lingerie a meaningful look.

  “Like what?”

  “How about a movie? We can cuddle on the couch.”

  “That sounds lovely.”

  Bella allowed me to lead her back to the living room and over to the couch, reclining gracefully while I selected a show on my smart TV and retrieved a soft throw that was big enough to cover the both of us. Although only to hide from the fact that her choice of attire was distracting me a little too much.

  I had a large library of James Bond and classic Hollywood Noir films. I selected one of the former to show Bella, not knowing whether or not she would appreciate an older film. My suggestion intrigued Bella, and she let herself be pleasantly surprised by the choice.

  After grabbing the remote and sliding the DVD into the player, I joined Bella on the couch under the blanket, pulling her onto my lap so we could rest comfortably in one of the corners, legs outstretched and intertwined.

  As one might expect, the movie was soon forgotten. In my defense, it was quite difficult to pay attention to fictionalized spy stories about villains and beautiful women when there was a lovely woman sitting in my lap.

  Sure, things started innocently enough. My hands may have moved down to hold her better, then she was playing with her clit and not doing a very good job of concealing her moans. Then the roles reversed, and she started toying with my manhood beneath the covers of the blanket, and the movie now just became a pretext and neither of us had any idea what was going on with the plot. Some explosions. Suggestions of sex, while the two of us contemplated our second round right there on the couch.

  Such are the way things go, and that’s exactly how it happened for Bella and I that night.

  17. (Lillian)

  “Rebecca?” I stood in the doorway to my roommate’s bedroom, feeling like an idiot as I blinked back tears of anger.

  Rebecca looked up from the book she was reading with a degree of concern. “Lily? What’s wrong.”

  “It’s Ash.” I sniffled, feeling small as I sat on Rebecca’s bed.

  She put h
er book aside and gently held onto my hands.

  “What did that idiot do this time?” She rolled her eyes, but still in a concerned way.

  “He’s—you remember how he seemed to be ignoring me?”

  “I told you, I’m pretty sure something must have happened to his phone.”

  “I thought that too, but then I messaged him on Instagram, and he blocked me.” The anger was rising again; that bastard.

  Rebecca’s face went dark with rage. “That blathering idiot. I told you that you were too good for him, Lily. There’s no doubt about that.”

  “But what did I do to deserve this?”

  “Nothing. You did nothing, Lily; you can’t blame yourself. That fool is blind if he thinks that this is acceptable behavior, or that you are anything less than absolutely wonderful.”

  “But he didn’t even explain anything, just blocked me; who does that?”

  “An underserving idiot, that’s who.”

  “I know, I know I should be strong and not blame myself.” My face reflected deep contemplation. “But it’s hard, especially when I was about to tell him that I loved him. I had fallen hard for him, Rebecca, really hard, and then he goes and does this. It doesn’t seem like him at all.”

  “Because he’s out of his mind. I’m so sorry that happened, Lily. Come here.” Rebecca opened her arms, and I went to her, and we embraced. “You’re strong and wonderful, and you don’t deserve this; don’t you ever forget that.”

  “Thank you, Rebecca.”

  “Of course, that’s what friends do, after all. We’re there for each other.”

  After a bit of calming down, I thanked Rebecca and retired to my bedroom. I grabbed my phone and absent-mindedly started swiping through, re-reading the conversations between Ash and me. And in that instant, unexpectedly, an abrupt flash of past lovers moved through me—the thought that Sebastian would never do this to me.

  Rebecca had just finished comforting me, letting me know that I didn’t have to be over it yet—wouldn’t have to be for a while—that was the way of love after all—and now the two of us were relaxing together on her bed, watching an old Spanish novella while we scrolled through social media.

  I grabbed my laptop from my bedroom and started editing some pictures I had taken for a recent issue of Illusions while we idly watched the television together. I was doing my best not to think of anything to do with Ash Bennett and just threw myself into work instead.

  It was as the main character on screen uncovered the plot against her life by her long lost second cousin who she had been slowly falling for, that I stumbled across the pictures after looking up something on the internet.

  At first, I couldn’t do more than look on in mute horror as Ash Bennett filled my screen, kissing another girl at a party. I thought that maybe there had been some mistake with the whole thing—a mishap with social media, an overprotective manager, something of the sort—but this left no questions, no doubt in my mind.

  There he was, Ash Bennett, making out with some other girl who clearly did not resemble me at all. As Rebecca turned to me to suggest that maybe we should focus on the novella for now—as it was getting quite interesting, and neither of us spoke Spanish quite fluently so we really would catch more if we set aside our phones and devices—she realized it was too late.

  I was already well aware of the tabloids of Ash, mouth agape, the photos I was editing forgotten, tears brimming in my eyes. Rebecca knew without even looking what must be on my screen, what I must be seeing to make me react in such a way. There was nothing she could do, she couldn’t protect me from it, she was too late in intervening.

  “I’m sorry you had to see that,” she said, gently taking my laptop from me. “He really is an idiot. He doesn’t know what he’s missing out on. I’m so sorry, Lillian.”

  I could feel a genuine pain rising in my chest as I stared down at the screen stay half open. A sense of panic was welling up, memories from my teenage years overwhelmed me. It happened again.

  Maybe not exactly, but I knew that the Ash in the photos, the Ash who had blocked me, the Ash who had ignored me, was a different Ash than the one I fell in love with. It was the world he lived in, giving in to the temptations of too much alcohol, of too many drugs again, breaking my heart in a way that I was sure he never would have if he was sober.

  I choked back tears, trying to remind myself to stay strong, that I didn’t care, that I had already moved past it, and that Ash had made his choice and I had no responsibility to him anymore. But the thoughts were overwhelming—that I had lost another person I loved, that maybe I was responsible, in some odd way, and I couldn’t control it anymore.

  “It hurts,” I said as the tears started coming, and Rebecca looked on, unsure how to respond. “I don’t want it to, but it hurts.”

  “I know, it’s okay, you’re allowed to hurt.”

  “But it hurts for other reasons too, for more—”

  I was cut off as a wave of sobs racked through my body and I was lost to the destructive power of my inner thoughts. I couldn’t even manage the energy to form the words to apologize. I had never wanted to be vulnerable like this again, after everything with Ash, I didn’t want to be forced to be vulnerable with people again.

  I didn’t want Rebecca to see me like this either, to feel like she had to deal with the torrent of my emotions. Rebecca clearly didn’t know what to do, she had never seen me in this kind of emotional state before.

  “Lillian, take deep breaths; what can I do; what do you need?” she asked, but I was too far into my head to respond; I was trying desperately to make my breathing calm and force my body to cooperate. Rebecca didn’t know what else to do. She picked up her phone and dialed the only person she knew who might be able to help.

  18. (Ash)

  I woke up with a pounding headache, unable to remember how I had gotten back to the hotel room, surprised that I was even in my bed. The sheets were tangled around me, and my body felt like a sweaty mess.

  With a groan, I slowly sat up, wincing as a sharp pain went through my head. I had no recollection of what happened the night before, but I knew that I must have drank a lot. I stumbled to the bathroom, guzzling down several glasses of water to make myself feel at least a little bit better. I ran a washcloth under some cold water, pressing it to my forehead; this aching hangover was worse than I thought. I headed back to bed, considering just spending the day holed up in the room, watching TV. I didn’t know if I could handle much else at the moment.

  I flopped back down onto the bed, grabbing the remote and turning the TV on, flipping through the channels trying to find something that was interesting, and then finally giving up and leaving it on a reality show with the volume down low. Looking around on the bedside table, I found my phone, groaning at the sight of the low battery warning and plugging it in to charge, then opening it up and scrolling through social media. Something mindless was what I needed. Something that required no thought, and very little brainpower.

  But what I got was a nightmare.

  With the time that had passed, the pictures had blown up, and it didn’t take me very long at all to stumble across them. At first, I scrolled past, thinking they were of someone else, not recognizing my likeness through the hungover haze.

  But then the pictures showed up on my feed again, and this time I was curious, wondering what the drama could be, and stopped to read the caption.

  Dreams of Compass Gods’ Lead Singer Ash Bennett Makes Out With Mystery Girl at Party.

  Part of me wished I hadn’t. I wanted to be able to live in blissful ignorance of the actions I had taken while intoxicated. But deep down, I also knew that this was important; it was bound to come up at some point, and this was something I couldn’t ignore, couldn’t run from.

  It took him a moment to believe it. I had to re-examine the picture, going over it twice, making sure that it wasn’t photoshopped. But when I realized that it truly was me, flashes of it came racing back into my mind, and I realized
what a huge mistake I made.

  The immediate guilt was overwhelming, adding to my nausea so much that I had to rush to the bathroom to heave into the toilet, my mind replaying everything that had happened over and over and over again.

  I thought of Lillian and the things she told me before I left. I knew she must have seen the pictures. There was no way she could avoid them, not in this world.

  What had I done?

  Had I just ruined the best thing to happen to me in a long time?

  I had to know, I had to talk to her. But my old phone was gone, and they hadn’t been able to retrieve my old contacts, so I didn’t have her number. I tried searching for her on Instagram instead, looking through the people I was following. But she wasn’t there either.

  Not allowing myself to believe it, I scrolled back through my old photos, finding a picture of the two of us where I had tagged her personally. But when I clicked on the username, I didn’t see her page. Instead, it brought him to an empty account with her profile picture and an error message. User not found.

  “Dammit!” I resisted the urge to bring myself past the point of anger, slamming the phone down on the table and turning away, burying my face in one of the expensive, plush hotel pillows. I didn’t know if there was any way back from this.

  I recognized that some of this had been self-destructive, a habit I tried to tame—apparently in vain. I should have tried to contact her as soon as I lost my phone, shouldn’t have let my manager push me around, shouldn’t have drank, shouldn’t have allowed myself to get to a place where I didn’t have conscious control over my actions.

  I only hoped now that she would at least let me apologize to her, to let her know that I was sorry, that I had never meant to break her trust in that way. I didn’t think there was any hope for a second chance.